22 things women in India are tired of hearing!

Sindhu M V Sindhu M V folomojo staff

Most often, as women in India, our lives revolve around what others say. The so many dos and don’ts are stifling.

Right from our childhood to our adolescence and even when after we are married, our every word, every action, is scrutinised and judged.

Here are some things that people have told you and me, us and others, yesterday and today.

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1. “Don’t laugh aloud. A coy smile is feminity.”

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2. “You should not talk about menstruation openly. Not even with your father or brother.”

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3. “Sex? Women should not talk about it openly. Forget about making the first move. It’s a man thing!”

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4. “Loose Tees and Jeans = tom boy. Minis and tube tops = sl**ty. Bangles and saree and salwar = traditional.”

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5. “War Journalist? Wildlife photographer? Choose a safer career like in bank or a IT company.”

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6. “Working in a late night shift? God knows what she is up to.”

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7. “OMG! You are 35 and not even married?”

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8.” Who wouldn’t want to have children. What’s wrong with you!”

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9. “You are a homemaker? Don’t you have any ambitions?”

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10. “Why do you want to work? Can’t you just take care of your family?”

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11.” A man has a divorce. Response – The women was too demanding. Poor guy had no option.”

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12. “A woman has a divorce. Response – She couldn’t even sacrifice a little bit for the family. She could have saved the marriage.”

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13. “When a boy flirts – How cute. When a girl flirts – B**ch!”

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14. “Women are bad drivers! They should just give up.”

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15. “Don’t address your husband by name. He deserves respect.”

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16. “Household chores are a woman’s responsibility.”

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17. “You are a homemaker? Such an easy life. What do you do all day?”

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18. “They don’t have children? I guess she has some problem.”

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19. “Getting up early is a sign of a good-natured married woman. How dare you get up at 10:00 o clock. It reflects your poor upbringing”

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20. “Why are you so late? Do you know what the neighbours will say?”

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21. “The guy has a good job and is well-settled. He’s perfect for you. Marry him.”

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22. “After marriage, don’t hang around with your male friends or colleagues. It does not speak well of you.”

 

Well, there are many more to add to the list. We need to break free from stereotypes and discrimination. We need to learn to listen to our heart and mind. We need to take pride in being a woman. But what is more important that we don’t say these things to others.

And, some of us are lucky, that we belong to loving families, where a woman is treated with love and respect and don’t really care about what the world out there says about her. We need more such families, more such people, who believe in – being human!